I have never been 'small', at least not since puberty. In elementary school, I played basketball and soccer. In highschool, I played field hockey, soccer and softball. I did hard physical work at the Virginia Zoological Park (It was the Lafayette Zoological Park at the time) several days a week. I rode my bicycle everywhere. I spent summers volunteering with the Student Conservation Association in Vermont and Ohio clearing trails, cutting wood, etc. I was no slouch. Yet I weighed 150lbs when I graduate highschool.
I've come to learn over the years that this is due to insulin resistance... expressed in myself as polycystic ovarian syndrome. In English: I've been overweight, hairy, prone to acne and have experience severe 'female' problems. Google "PCOS" for more information about that syndrome. I may discuss it some more in later posts, but not right now. It meant that when I wanted to get pregnant, I had to undergo many medical interventions to conceive.
Now, at 45, it means that I'm continuing to gain weight, and that is causing me other medical issues. My lower back is killing me, especially if I have to walk more than half a mile. My knees are crap. My blood pressure is creeping upward. Carpal tunnel syndrome. My feet hurt.
My weight and consequent health issues are starting to really interfere with my life... I love scuba diving, but dread the struggle to put on a 3mm wetsuit and haul a tank/bcd to the water. We fly kites (I mean seriously fly kites... 13ft wide kites, 81 square foot kites, kites that require house anchors to tie them down...). Just packing up our kites at the end of a 'fun fly' is murder for me, walking back and forth, bending over, lifting and tossing kite bags. I can't join my daughter in physical play, though I would love to teach her basketball, soccer, tennis...
Clothes that used to fit me well, now, well don't. It's hard to find shirts that are not too short, such that they show my tummy when I lift my arms. It's just plain hard to find clothes that fit well and feel good.
So I am doing something somewhat drastic. I'm going to go on the Medifast plan. I have two friends who have been successful with it. The plan is lower carbohydrate, which is appropriate for me with my metabolic issues... The Medifast plan is somewhat restrictive calorically, but with the protein, fat and fiber profile of the plan, one stays in apetite-killing ketosis. I've ordered two months worth of Medifast food. I figure I'll have an idea by six weeks whether this will work for me or not. That will give me two weeks to order more food before I run out if I want to continue beyond 8 weeks. I need to lose something over 100lbs.
I've mentioned to my husband that I want to do something, that I'm tired of always being in pain. He is a wonderful, supportive man, whom I love with all my heart. I know he will think me a bit silly for spending money to do it... afterall, he's never needed to buy anything to lose weight... but I know he'll support me anyway.
My back makes it difficult to do a whole lot of exercise right now. I'll walk as much as the back will allow. Once I lose about 50 pounds though I think I'll be able to get a bit more agressive with the exercise.
Of course one disadvantage to losing a whole lot of weight is that my wetsuit that I had to have custom-made for around $500, because I'm too fat for anything off the rack, will not fit me any more. I'll be happy to pay to have it altered, and/or buy a wetsuit off-the-rack!
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